Saturday, September 16, 2006

In case i buy myself a new handphone,
let me just save my last sms/argument with him that night.

Time check:9.37pm - seconds after i saw that picture in fotopages.
Date: 17/1/2006

Usually, i dun call him by his name.
Me: Din, u ingat tak dulu upromise tt we need to talk? Can we do it this week? (9:37:02pm)
Him: Wheneva im free. We can meet up 1 day.. My werking hourz iregular (9:42:34pm)
==>At that time, i still think he was working as an engineer.
Me: I dun care. We meet, we talk n we get it over and done with. After that, if u dun wanna meet me anymore, its ur choice. But we really have to talk face to face. (9:45:40pm)
Him:Mcm ade perkara serious je.. (9:45:42pm)
Me:I shd sthink so too..N i think u shd know better... (9:48:02pm)
Him: Huh? What thing?? (9:48:47pm)
Me: How would i know? (9:51:22pm)
Him: If u dun noe, then how wd i noe? (9:52:55pm)
Me: Exactly! Coz i need to find out from you! (10:14:54pm)
Him: Yah! I'm wondering what u wana find out from me.. (10:15:01pm)
Me: What i know i wanna find out something from u and i need to know wbt it. We will definitely have to talk. U better find the time. (10:29:32pm)

Him: Abt what? (10:30:26pm)
Me: Coz frm the way i see it, u r the one who is not cooperating coz u r making excuses after excuses. u always said one day, make that one day happen. (10:31:59)

Him: Wat actualli u wanted to noe frm me? (10:46:56 pm)
Me: Stop asking tt very same question. Just meet me ok so that we will talk abt it n settle things then i wont need to find out things abt u. (10:49:35pm)
Him:Better tell me now or i wont be seing u! (10:55:03pm)
Me: Really? U r threatening me now? U meet me this week or u can start deleting my number, stop messaging me, delete my email add or anything tt has got to do with me. I can't believe tt we r arguing this via sms! (10:58:56pm)
Him:U start it 1st. Now wat is the matter u gona wanted to noe? (11.00:40pm)
Me: We have to talk abt it face to face. (11:01:31pm)
Him: Yah at least u let me now at exactly u wanted to noe. (11:02:32pm)
Me: Why? So tt u can think of a way to bluff it through n tt i'm being unreasonable n create a story so tt i wld believe everything u say? (11:05pm)
Him: Whatver u say! I'm tired of asking u frm just now.. (11:07:40pm)
Me: Meet me tmrw at 6:15 at tanjong pagar mrt station.(11:09:42pm)
Him: No. I'm nt going to meet u. (11:10:29pm)
Me:So that means u really have something to hide from me ()11:11:29pm)
Him: Hide wat?! Up 2 u la! (11:12:48pm)
Me: Exactly! I just need u to tell me straight to my face that wat i heard, wat i saw or wat i had assume is true. If not, then i won't talk abt this issue to u anymore. (11:35:35pm)
Him:What have u heard, saw and assume all this while? (11:38:13pm)
Me: Something which is serious enough to be mentioned here. Something which hurts me so bad tt i duno whether to believe it or not. (11:45:00pm)
Him:What thing is so serious: (11:45:54pm)

Time check: 18 Jan 2006, midnight

Me: I'm not making up excusesjust to meet u k? this is not petty little things abt u that i can simply ignore. To me, its a big issue as to where we're going. (12:11:56 am)
Him: Wateva u say (12:13:16am)
Me: Now u think im making it all up just to see you??!! (12:20:02am)
Him: Nv tot of tt. I'm not sure wat u wanted 2 noe frm me n fyi im bz wif werk unless u ok 2 meet me after 11pm.. Other than tat, i'm sori.. (12:23:31am) [at tt time, i tot, "kepala hotak kau berdengung nak jumpa after 11!"]
Me:After 11pm mana i boleh!! Takkan u kerja hari2 till 11?! (12:26:11am)
Him: Some days i knock off early..But only can c u in the evening.. Ard 8+ gitu.. If u can't then tats 2 bad. (12:28:17am)
Me: Now ur maiking it sound like im the onett's being difficult. Wat happen tu ur once a week off day?(12:31:17am)
HIm:Usually i slept during my off days.. N i hv 2 accompany mum if needs 2 go 2 market. (12:33:37am) [LAME!!]
Me:Sarifice ur sleep for a few hours n meet up then after tt u can sleep for as long as u want. The issue will not end till we have a one to one talk. (12:40:01am)
Him:Hmm, i uess not.. Y dun u jus tell me wats the serious topic tat u wanted to noe? (12:44:27am)

After that sms, i gave up and went to sleep.

Time check: 18 January 2006, 1.02:26pm
After asking my fren, his cousin, the owner of that fotopage, that he was truly that. And she confirmed it with me, providing more details than i asked for, that i shut her off unintentionally by replying "thanks, ___, i dun need the details." Which apparently, according to her, was hurtful (she told me that she felt a little offended when i met up with her for dinner tt weekend..Sorry.)

Me: I heard u are enggaged. Thats the serious issue i wanna know. Coz tt will explain perfectly well why u kept giving me excuses everytime we were to meet. (01:02:26pm)

No reply...

19 January 2006, 5:45pm
Me: Its true kan? How long do u intedn to hide it from me?Did u forget tt u were 2 be enggaged b4 we talked in november? Or b4 we patch things up 2 years ago?How could u din! (5:49:00pm)

Me: Ukept me in d dark for 8 years n i got myself a rude shock when got 2 know ur status as ____ fiance by pure chance. And how u deny enything from me! (6:00:27 pm)

Him: Dry mana u dengar? (7:32:52pm)

Thats the last i heard from him. Till the online conversation on June 17.

"I found out abt it by pure chance. And tt i have my own reliable rources answer me coz i couldn't rely on u to get my anqns answered."

"U're not telling me anything? I need ans to my qns tt've been running thru my head since tt day . I could have died of heart attack when i got to know, din!"

The end.

Time check: currently, its close to 3 months to his big day.

Now, if i really buy myself a new hp, those messages which were kept in a folder in my current hp, are still somewhere in my blog, which will serve me as a reminder what an *fill in the blank* he can be.